Saturday, June 04, 2005

Luckily I Name My Dog Bruno....

Everyone names their dog either "Rover" or "Spot".I however, made the mistake of calling mine "sex".

Now sex has been embarrassing me. When I went to the City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk that I would like a license for sex. He said "I would like one too!!". Then I said "But this is for the dog". He said "I don't care what she looks like!".Then I said "You don't understand, I've had sex since I was 9!".He said "You must have been quite a kid!".

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. Not wanting the dog to bother us, I told the clerk at the hotel that I wanted a room forme and my wife and a special room for sex. He said that every room in the place was right for sex. I said" You don't understand, sex keeps me awake all night". The clerk replied "me too".

One day I entered sex in a dogshow and before the competition begin; one of the contestant asked me what I was doing. I told him I planned to have sex in the show. He said that I shouldhave sold my own tickets. I asked him if the show was telecast. He called me a pervert.

It was one of those days where I had to send my dog for a checkup. As I was in a hurry I just left my dog with the veterinarian. When I went to pick him up, Isaid "I have come for my dog". She said "Which one -spot or rover??" I said " What about sex?". She slapped me. When I got sex, I asked her if sex was good to her. She slapped me again.

One day, sex ran away and I went to the dog pound.As I was looking in all the cages, the guard came over to me. I said i was looking for sex. He said that Iwas looking in all the wrong places.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody over the dog. I said "Your honour, I had sex before I was married". He said "So what's your point? so did I". I said " but my wife wants to take sex away from me"He said "That's what happens in a divorce".

Last night sex ran off again. I spent hours looking for him in town. A cop came and asked me "What are youdoing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?". I said I was looking for sex.

My case comes up Friday.

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